Even writing hurts. This thing I sometimes love more than life…hurts.
I want to stop. To put it off. To wait until I can write about things that sparkle and bring light to your eyes. I want to wait until I can make you smile, make you laugh, make you remember why we’re even friends.
I don’t want to hurt. And I don’t want to be the girl who’s always hurting. And I don’t want to be the girl you roll your eyes at because she just. Won’t. Stop. Complaining.
I want God to give me shiny, happy words. Because I want to be shiny and happy.
But He’s called me to this: the right now…the ugly and real…the what-you-see-is-what-you-get.
And some days, I hate it. Today is one of those days…
In my last post, I referenced Isaiah 54:10:
“Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken, nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord who has compassion on you. (NIV)
That was just a few short weeks ago and even then, I couldn’t possibly imagine how much He’d be willing to shake, how much He’d be willing to remove.
My world’s a small world. And I have taken things like love and friendship and kindness and peace for granted.